Holding A Grudge Hurts You
Have you ever had someone hold a grudge against you? Are you holding a grudge against other people?
Sometimes people will do or say things that hurt your feelings. Now they may not have meant to hurt your feeling, maybe you took them the wrong way. Sometimes people don’t know how to communicate their feeling very well, and they get taken the wrong way. Feeling are feeling, they are not necessarily the truth.
We can’t help the way we feel. Feelings are based off of our past experiences. We can’t always help how we feel, we can however control how we react to our feelings. Sometimes you just have to take people with a grain of salt. Not everyone is in the same place in life that you are. Some people are more mature than others.
I had someone hold a grudge against me for over 10 years. The sad part was that I didn’t even know that she was holding a grudge against me. I always wondered why she never came around when we would go to visit. So for 10 years she missed out on spending time with My husband, and my kids. So did I suffer because of her grudge? No not really, it was her loss. She was the one who suffered because it festered inside her for 10 years. I didn’t even know about it. Holding a grudge hurts you, it doesn’t hurt the person the grudge is being held against. Well it might hurt some if you knew it existed but eventually you say their loss and you go on with your life. I didn’t even know about it so it didn’t hurt me.
When I did find out about it I confronted her to resolve it. She wasn’t interested, so I wrote her a letter and I put her in God’s hands. I told her I forgave her for holding a grudge for all those years, and I did. See I wasn’t going to hold a grudge against her because she held one against me. I wasn’t going to put myself through that. So I forgave her. Today she doesn’t avoid me so I guess she let it go too. She never spoke about it again.
Holding A Grudge Hurts You– Families sometimes have issues with holding a grudge.
I think families sometimes have issues because families are so close and they know each other so well. Sometimes one person likes to control everyone else and the others in the family get mad and say things in anger. You just got to let things go. Things said in the heat of the moment or a moment of stupidity aren’t worth getting all upset over. We need to have a little compassion for those around us. They say that you always hurt the ones you love. It shouldn’t be that way. Remember we all have feeling. We can’t control how we feel, but we can control how we respond to our feelings. Don’t hold grudges because the person it hurts is you!
Holding a grudge hurts you! Let it go, forgive and set yourself free from the bitterness and resentment that is festering inside you. Then you will be free to live life as a happy person.
Deirdre Powell (Dee)
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Thank you Deirdre. What you said about holding a grudge hurting the person HOLDING the grudge is spot on. It not hurts your emotionally but that dark energy can manifest as physical disease too. ANd yes, it’s inside many families where this plays out. We’ve all held grudges and had them held against us. It’s amazing the emotional release that comes when you can finally clear up the issue. Thanks for sharing.
Thanks for your comment Matt. Yes holding a grudge can manifest as physical disease. It’s best to let it go, you are worth more.
Great post, Deirdre. : )
So true.
Contrition is to the offender’s benefit.
And your forgiveness is for YOUR benefit.
As you said: “We can’t always help how we feel, we can however control how we react to our feelings.”
It IS possible to experience emotions without becoming “emotional”.
Thank you for sharing.
Thanks for your comment John, It does benefit us to forgive. Even if the other person doesn’t accept it.